My Own War for Independence

Alexa partying down in her fourth of July dress.

It's been almost a month since I posted. We're a mere ten days from Alexa's first birthday. Alexa is growing and changing faster than ever before. So, what has been keeping me from sharing her every accomplishment and bragging about her ever growing cuteness? Well, the short answer is that I've been sick.The explanation of the sickness is much longer, but here goes.

Alexa gives the best hugs! Daddy doesn't know how how he feels about her hugging young boys, though.

I hadn't been blogging a lot because I had been so damn tired. But, tired really seems like an understatement. I'd really been feeling overwhelmed by the world. I couldn't understand why being a Mom and having a full-time job was wiping me completely out. COMPLETELY. Like, coming home, sleeping on the couch, not really being able to play with Alexa wiped out. I got more and more frustrated and kept trying new and different things but kept coming to the same end results. I was convinced that it was my own shortfall and limitations as a person and that I would just HAVE to find a way to work around my own personal limitations. It never once occurred to me that I might be sick.

Alexa's first ponytail!

Then, one day I had symptoms that made me think I might have a parasite. I had no idea how I might get a parasite, but with some good old WebMD research I diagnosed myself with having one and went to the doctor for confirmation. Turns out, my honorary web based medical degree led me astray. I didn't have a parasite. I had yeast overgrowth in my intestines and general toxicity. Further testing uncovered a vitamin B deficiency and salmonella. More testing discovered another non-specified bacterial infection. I'm on more medications and vitamins than ever in my life. I'm on a crazy diet that I try to keep, but am really struggling. My progress is stupid slow. I'm one month into treatment and have just as many symptoms as I started with.

Alexa can stand on her own, but not long enough for us to capture it on film. Here she is practicing!

The issue that makes this condition so hard to heal is that when yeast overgrows in your intestines, it lowers your immune system and allows bad bacteria to penetrate. Once the bacteria launch a live infection you have to take antibiotics. The antibiotics kill the good yeast, further reducing the healthy balance in your intestines. So, in order to get well you have to hit that short window where you've killed off the bad bacteria and you build up your good yeast faster than the next infection can invade.

This diagnosis will have lifelong implications on my health. The yeast overgrew in my intestines because I have yeast sensitivity, which is kind of like an allergy. I've likely had it most of my life, but am being diagnosed for the first time. I now know it'll be a long battle back to health, but I'm up for it. I take it day by day and have faith that someday soon I'll wake up with energy again.