Shiny Happy People

Love me, love me (Alexa is looking at me in this pic because she now recognizes my voice.)

Michael Stipes said it best. Today we were some shiny happy people. It felt so much better than yesterday. We were happy, happy. And yes Michael, I will put it in the ground where the flowers grow.

There's a reason I didn't post yesterday. It was just too hard. Although Alexa's blood work came back showing less infection yesterday, Alexa just didn't act the same. It was the first day that she seemed sick. She never woke up the entire 10 hours I was there and she didn't eat her minimums. The last thing I saw last night was Alexa getting a feeding tube. She cried, gagged and cried some more. I had to leave at 7 p.m. for the nurse change, so staying was not an option. I picked her up for a few minutes. She whimpered and then settled. The second I put her back down she bawled again. And I was forced to walk away. It still brings tears to my eyes just thinking about it. My heart broke and all I could do was sleep. I just couldn't manage being conscious and thinking about the look of pain on her face when I left.

Today was a different story. It was like we were with a different baby. She was awake for a good 2.5 to 3 hours while we were there. In newborn world (sick or not) that's quite a bit. She sucked down her bottles and begged for more. She was supposed to leave her feeding tube in all day in case she didn't hit her minimums, but our fighter Alexa decided she was over it and pulled the feeding tube out when I ran to the bathroom....and that thing was long! One good pull would not get it out. She would have to pull hard 2 to 3 times in a row to get it out, and she succeeded! As soon as I got back she started whining for another bottle. That's my girl! Everyone around loves her, loves her.

We didn't get any blood work today because it's the weekend and the tests take longer. I expect good news tomorrow though.

Thank you so much everyone for your love and support. Your texts, e-mail, calls and gifts are giving us the strength to make it through. Sara, your love, support and endless gifts are more appreciated than you'll ever know. (You'll see she's sporting Dora the Explorer just for her auntie today.) Julie, your rattling dogs are a big hit with Alexa! (We know she can hear because she turns her head at the sound.) Mom & Cary, thank you for the lunch, support and house cleaning. (And being good sports that the one day you saw Alexa she was feeling really bad.) Greg and Lori, "Big Red Barn" and "If you Take a Mouse to School" were big hits with Alexa today. (She loves a good story. The other two books will go with us tomorrow.) And Gar-Bear, thank you for loaning Mama Pat to us for a few days. (We know you'll miss her.) And to all of our friends and family who have left us blog comments, we read and cherish every one. Just knowing that all of you are out there praying for our new family means the world to us.

Happy, happy - put it in your heart (I couldn't stop smiling after she chugged her second bottle and fell into a deep and peaceful sleep.)

Shiny happy people holding hands (Daddy loves to hold hands with his little girl.)

Check out REM - Alexa Style